Sabah, Day 4: Road Trip!

I've always known that long car rides have always been my thing--the whole looking-out-the-window-while-listening-to-music kind of thing.  So, today was very enjoyable for me, even on the bumpy roads. :D

Woke up early again and followed my mom to the morning market near my house to get some cakes, char siew paus and dumplings for my friends for breakfast.  I think playing host throughout the week has really gotten me more involved in my own kitchen and microwave--haha.  Something I take for granted with my mom and kakak around but I don't think I did half bad working the microwave, serving the food and drinks, washing the plates and containers after, etc.  If it weren't for them coming over, I wouldn't have felt as independent as I did.  Especially since I didn't have the chance to do much around my own house for the past three years and especially so, since I'm leaving this coming month.  Makes me appreciate everything around the house even more. I think there were some firsts i.e. the most people in my house (especially the kitchen and dining area) than ever in my 19 years of living in the house.  I guess that's one of the things with a small family, you always know where everyone is every time of the day and it threw me off a bit when my friends came over coz someone was always doing something else.  I think my mom and dad realised the change as well.  Everyone was all over the place but of course, it wasn't necessarily a bad thing, in fact, I like the life my friends injected into my household.  It was just a different vibe which I enjoyed for a change.

I didn't drive but having my KL friends around also made me more aware of the roads around KK and Sabah.  Got my sense of direction working as we looked for the places we had to go as well as the shortest routes to places.  Made me appreciate how conveniently close all the places were in Sabah and relatively less traffic it had as opposed to bigger cities like KL.

First stop was the Maranjak Rungus Longhouse which we later found out was actually a lodge in which tourists could actually stay! Hm, perhaps it would be an interesting experience.  Next time. Maybe.

Also met a nice Rungus lady who had been selling her handmade scarves, keychains, boxes and jewellery for 10 years.  I realised I enjoyed the very human and historical aspect of the people in the longhouse too.  I asked her whether her children were doing the same thing and she said yes, she also told us that it took her around one to two days to finish one whole necklace.  And me being the sucker for people like this, I bought a scarf from her thinking it would also be nice to hang up some stuff from home in my US dorm.

Several winding roads later, we reached the epic Tip of Borneo at Tanjung Simpang Mengayau, Kudat and unloaded the basket loads of food we brought and gobbled them down before heading to the actual tip!

The view was gorgeous, the sea was authentically bluish green and it was the strongest wind I've ever experienced.  So strong that if you looked at the trees, they were all tilted to one side, like a slanted world. Hmm.  Not far off from how my world is, by any chance.

I'm telling you I felt like I could have flown away.  That was how strong it was.  And I'm talking nonstop wind.

Yes, we were literally holding hands to keep ourselves, for lack of a better word, grounded.

Then, we stopped by the beach to get a glimpse of the blue ocean and fooled around a bit more.

Found an old boat to sit on as I recharged with some quiet time away from humans.  Discovered that I needed it more than I thought I did.

This shot looks epic. Haha.  T'was unintentional, I promise.

Um, yea.  This probably was intentional.  Though, didn't get to straighten my legs coz the wind was always threatening to blow me off the tree trunk.

We were a bit groggy from dozing off on the van but were okay after getting down at Kampung Sumangkap, a community of gong makers.  We met this cool guy who memorised the sound of all the keys so that he could replicate a particular key every time he made a gong so that it would have the desired note--MIND BLOWN.  Maybe that's why Sabahans are generally more musically inclined.

Some say largest gong created

Ended the night with some Tuaran mee which everyone outrightly enjoyed and Bak Kut Teh which Tiara got addicted to its free refills. 

And we practically ran to the fountain at Perdana Park to catch the last musical fountain show and stayed until they annonced that they were closing the park. 

I wasn't very sure about everyone else but I was pretty wiped out at the end of everything.  The long hot shower was doubly amazing as I reminisced on the interesting conversations we had on the van ride home about our future, psychology, physiotherapy, appendicitis and pain among other things. Hah.

Coz my friends are awesome like that. (:

Sabah, Day 3: Mosquitos, Coconuts & Burgers

Started off the day with some Dim Sum at Foo Phing which everybody loved, t'was pretty cheap too--RM8.50 per person.  We hit the road to Jambatan Tamparuli, the famous hanging bridge which someone enjoyed swaying so vigorously as we made our way across.  

It was nice to check out the local tamu, bought some nice kuih and some of them got their hands on some cheap bags and wallets.  The hawkers were extremely friendly.

The hot sun made it perfect timing for coconut pudding!!! I loved it and I already predicted that my friend would love it just as much.  Just heavenly.  Although, it was here that our relationship with mosquitos officially began.  I don't know what it is but I also discovered that mosquitos in Sabah seemed to have built this strong resistance because I was so sure I saw one flying right across mid-spray of mosquito repellent.  The horror of resistant mosquitos was not something I liked thinking about.

Tiara and Ivy in their best mosquito-swatting poses

Next stop, we found the Monsopiad Cultural Village in time and were given a tour of the whole area from local wine-making, stilt-walking, blow darting, starting fire out of bamboo to some history on the warrior, Monsopiad.  I decided to try the local wine (Li Hing, Talak and Sikat) so I could at least explain to people asking what it tasted like.  Honestly, my first thoughts were that Li Hing tasted like 100 Plus, Talak like water and Sikat was a bitter version of it.  True enough, we found out that Talak and Sikat were actually diluted in water because the real thing had 45% alcohol in it (gulp).  And Li Hing only had 5% alcohol, yet it tasted pretty strong. Gee, wonder what that says about alcohol.

Tiara: The only reason why I'm still standing is coz you're holding me.

Sago worm (butod) = squishy worm with very strong muscles. Cute guys.

When you think about it, I think we were pretty lucky because it only started raining at our last stop of the tour--couldn't have been any more perfect timing as we took shelter in the souvenir shop.  The cultural performance had the Sumazau Dance, Sazau Dance, Angklang and Magunatip Dance.  It made me really happy when almost all my friends went up to try the dance out when the dancers invited us, even those who were rather shy or those you wouldn't think would've said yes.  I think sometimes when you bring people out of their familiar settings, it pushes them to try and do things that they wouldn't normally do.  It was nice, really. (:

At least it looked like I knew what I was doing.

We also met a group of aunties from Penang who were very enthusiastic during the dance performances and it was such a coincidence (if you want to call it that) for us to meet them again in Sutera Harbour Resort!  It was crazy that of all the four hotels that Sutera Harbour had, they chose the same one we did and of all the locations overlooking the sea, they were at the same one we were at--I just love how God and his magic interweaves all these things together.

We took a trip to Tanjung Aru Beach again in hopes of catching the sunset but the clouds didn't seem to want to budge.  But we made the most of it nonetheless coz that's what we do.

Oh, Callie :)

Couldn't help but play some music.

Decided to bring them to this Burger Bakar place near my house which I never tried before but thanks to Bev and Amber, I knew where it was.  Some hearty food is all it takes.

Spotted one feebly twinkling star in the night sky. Perfect way to end the night.

Sabah, Day 2: Of Sunny Storms and Mud Showers

Woke up at 6.10 am.  It has got to be some record for someone who is DONE with college for now (:D) and is on her study break.  Well, it was for a 'good' cause--ISLAND HOPPING! Lathered lots of sunblock and it was nice to find all my friends awake and ready to go for something nowhere near compulsory nor did it entail a final grade coz I know how hard it is for some of them to wake up that early (you're talking to a night owl majority in the population).

I was a bit antsy about the time we got back (felt bad for coming off stubborn to friends) but only coz my dad sent me a newspaper clipping of warnings about strong wind today.  We made it to the dock and were greeted with a very very very dark cloud in the horizon which went on to cover the island completely--it was moving our way for sure.  The next thing I knew, I was swallowed by a crowd of tourists screaming "Run!" in Korean, Japanese, Chinese and whoknowswhatotherlanguage.  We took shelter at a futsal place and I laughed my head off seeing Tiara document everything on her iPhone, almost unperturbed by the monsoon-like wind, falling chairs and billowing canvas rooftops.

So...islands were out of the question.  Desmond decided to brave the rain in his swimsuit to get the car only to get back 15 minutes later telling us his car was stuck in the mud.  Such wonderful timing, you don't say.  Two of my friends went to help, I called them a couple of minutes in if they needed more hands and they declined, asking us to stay put.  Iz, Callie and I were not happy with the idea of not getting down and dirty to help so we just ignored them and went anyway.  Sure enough, we got the car moving by putting the car mat below the wheel and mid-way, half cheering, we forgot we were standing right behind the wheel and basically got sprayed with mud from top to toe.  IT WAS UH-MA-ZING. Haha.

You can probably ask me a million times and I'll say the same thing:  Literally playing in the rain and mud was the best time I had throughout the trip.  We packed appropriately, after all.

It's amazing how everything just works out so perfectly, unpredictably, but perfectly if you just have a little faith.  Dance in the rain, guys. (:

Everyone ended up in my house for a hot shower which felt good.  When the rain finally cleared up, we brought them to Tanjung Aru Beach to satisfy their much-needed cravings for the sand and sea water.

Then, we headed to Kiansom Waterfall which was another gem--hiking with hands and slippers, crossing streams and climbing giant rocks was never in mind but I could tell my friends were as excited and happy as I was if not more.

Just looking at these pictures make me smile in nostalgia :)

I was very wrong in thinking the day couldn't have gotten any better as Desmond brought us to his fave seafood place near the Filipino Night Market and it was...heavenly: the seafood, the beaming atmosphere of people, smell, taste and faces--everything.  And I think it's saying something because I'm not a huge fan of seafood, never thought much about it but this place seemed to have this interesting side to it that changed me.  The food was cheap and very delicious, the sellers were friendly, the other customers I saw were a good bunch to observe and of course, the company of good friends always makes all things great.

Thanks to Callie's awesome appetite, we not only went for supper at the awesome fried dumpling shop but we also checked out a wall climbing place AND skate park out of sheer randomness! Such wonderful and unexpected adventures to end the night.

Loved it.

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Sabah, Day 1: Storm's A-brewing

I've been doing a lot of thinking.  Thinking about revamping this site or changing the way I post.  But I guess that idea is for another post (that should be figured out soon) as I have also been keeping busy with a recent visit paid by my friends to my hometown!  Just like so many experiences, I found myself thinking about a lot of things that I felt so necessary to pen down before they get lost in my rusty memory bank.  I couldn't really think of a way of toning down on the wordiness yet achieving the desired expression of thoughts so I decided to do it old school--journal style.  This is day one.

*

Stayed up pretty late the night before doing a massive clean-up of my room that I have not been truly using for 3 years (thanks to college and the US).  Sifting through old and new junk was very nostalgic in a way, coming across the old crayon highlighters I used for SPM to the barn-shaped prom invitation card from my US high school made my brain bring up old files and remember those feelings at the tip of my senses.  Good therapy, I would say.  It also dawned on me that even in the pressure I take upon myself in making sure everything was perfect for my friends, I was happy they came.  I was happy that if it weren't for them, I wouldn't have checked off one of the things on my list to do before leaving: give my room much needed refurbishing. It also dawned on me that the way things were arranged and the contents of my shelves reflected how I defined myself at the time--from some jewellery and Kamus Dewans, I finally got down to redecorating it with a thousand mementos from the US & high school (being a sucker for sentimental value) and basically flooded my shelf and drawer with the whole she-bang of art supplies, art work and a set of John Green books I hoped to open in a couple weeks.

Waiting outside the arrival hall for my friends made me realise how my pulse raced every single time I go to an airport.  Flashes of my first nervous encounter with my US host family and the thought of waiting for people you love or meeting them again regardless if it was the first or hundredth time always play in head.  Sometimes, I think I am too emotionally attached to places and objects.  Gah.

Showed them around my house and their 3 am wake up time prior to the flight proved lethal as my friends crashed one-by-one. So, Bev, Amber and I headed downstairs and killed time looking at my old photo albums which I thought I should do more often.  

Finally got out of the house, albeit a little late, and brought them to try Sang Nyuk Mee which they liked.  We split up to get some grub for this evening's barbecue/picnic party by the beach, excitedly planning things to get in our heads.

The crazy wind and pouring rain was the first arguable letdown of the trip especially it being their first day but looking back, I liked how the day turned out.  We decided to camp out in my backyard and I relished our attempts to cook the frozen nuggets and sausages over Desmond's barbeque pit even if my stove was a door away.  If it weren't for my friends, I would never in a million years picture this image of hosting people in my backyard: coffee table and chairs from my dining room and old towels on the cement floor all spread out beside recycled newspapers and half of the bunk bed taken down from my room four years ago.  Honestly, having an open house was also on my bucket list before leaving and who knew the Big Guy made it so fitting that I'd check it off too.  From laughing at the endless croaking toads that annoyed my KL friends to dramatically singing One Day More from Les Miz with my besties, the day couldn't have gotten any better, really.  It was an epic jamming and cooking session, not to mention my first lesson in baking nuggets (thanks Amber!).

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Offbeat.

This is a bit out of my usual self.  I usually take a long time to think about what I am about to write but this came out of the blue and it is a mixture of feelings while listening to a song that struck me quite deeply and after a visit to my high school after almost three years.

I wanna go where the lights are low and the dreamers are chasing,
I wanna live like we don't know much but we know we're gonna make it,
I don't wanna spend another night alone,
I wanna go cause if we don't leave now, then we're never gonna make it home.

.

This next one is a very raw version of something I wrote today.  Usually, I reread it over and over again, let it sit for a couple of hours (days sometimes) and think about how to improve or change it but this time, it was a bit different and it does bug me to actually put this out when it feels very...raw and unedited to perfection but I just feel like I want it to be that way.  It does not have a title.  

So, here it is:

The soiled cement floors of greyish-brown,

The smiles of top student posters, I frown.

The slow chatter of teachers echo

In the austere hall, the mem’ries bellow

but the earthly wall is bricked and piped,

The stage repainted and floor retiled.

These sights and sounds I hear alone

as I make my uneventful way back home.

Foreign faces – fleeting but strong,

Yet the strange familiar coaxes me

For a talk just like old times, I grin.

Topics unchanged but different tunes we sing

Of songs with varied choruses

Just these two years can bring:

Heart ache, triumph, death and gumption,

Failures, surprises, lessons and bull

That have shaped, ultimately, how we function.

This is not a story of nostalgia

Nor is it too much an ode to mentors.

Not intended for bitter complacency

Or bold proclamation – I’ve found myself!

But this is just me being as genuine as can be:

Travelling, the world overwhelms the climber

with what-ifs, why-nots, and how-comes,

Stumbling, I still flounder with it all

but I learn that it’s okay to fall,

Returning, I see how much I’ve changed

and how much has stayed the same.

And instead of trying to find the answer,

No matter how green the other side seems

Or how much I still don’t understand,

I am exactly where I am supposed to be,

In this place, at this time,

Travelling, stumbling, free-falling,

 to learn a little bit more of how to be:

me.

.

And to end this rather random post, this is another song that has also struck me quite deeply and I feel there is a lot of things that reflects my thoughts in this song.

Everybody’s been there, everybody’s been stared down
By the enemy
Fallen for the fear and done some disappearing
Bow down to the mighty
Don’t run, stop holding your tongue
...
Show me how big your brave is

Say what you wanna say
And let the words fall out
Honestly I wanna see you be 

brave.

A lot has happened.

A lot has happened. 

And you realise a whole lot MORE has happened when you look at your life in retrospect, in which part of it is narrated in a series of blog posts.  I started this post not knowing how to begin and not knowing how to end mainly due to the fact that I have so much to say and I have no idea how to say it.

2013. These past few months have been filled with me trying to rediscover my voice, what I believed in and who I was.  And not being afraid to show that to the world. Even if it meant being vulnerable.

2013 has also been a year of important decisions in my life.  I believe that my perspective on so many things especially what my goals are in life have evolved.  I admit that I have dived into many things, fallen in love with some, learnt the hard way in others, found myself slipping away from God now and again and just struggling to find that balance on the tight rope I was walking on.

2013 is the year that I realise, after reflecting on all these harrowing and beautiful experiences in the past two years after high school, that there is no such thing as never losing balance; that it is okay to fall.  What matters is that you keep on getting back up, keep on having that sheer courage to keep on giving your whole heart in what you are doing and have faith in the Man upstairs that everything's going to be alright.  It is so difficult to live this out, let me tell you, but it is a work in progress and I have faith that things will fall into place in time. (:

I also learnt more about myself - my strengths and my weaknesses.  I believe it was a puzzle that I did not complete until very recently.  A few weeks ago, I made a long hard-thought decision to drop a subject - History.  It takes great pain for me to even write about this but I feel that it must be done.  Writing has always been the means I felt best at expressing my feelings which came so naturally to me as opposed to talking.  What I set out to achieve when I first took up the subject was to learn, to grow not only from the textbook but from my peers.  And having endured 3 crazy semesters of cross-eyed reading, tireless presentations and close-to-death exams, I can tell you that what I have learned from my History classmates and the engaging discussions in the classroom have been priceless.  It has been one of the most enriching experiences I have ever had in my 19 years of academic life and I would never change that.  I had achieved what I set out for and at that point, I felt that I was no longer doing it because I loved it but because I was trying to get this grade and finish that assignment.  What it came down to was between me pushing myself beyond what was mentally and physically healthy for me and my happiness.  It came to a point when I was just drained, tired and not fully recovered from the stress and pressure that had fallen upon me from the last semester.  It came to the point that I was no longer pushing myself because I knew I could give more but I was pushing myself because I was afraid of letting people down, of letting myself down and of failure.  Long story short, I was given a choice.  And this was what I chose: 

To have the courage to say no.  The courage to face the truth and choose my happiness over losing myself to the world and its judgement.  The courage and wisdom to see that when you lose your balance on the tight rope, you get back up and keep on going.  And I truly believe that I have never stopped doing that. 

2013 is also the year I decide which direction I want the next four years of my life to take.  It basically came down to Hampshire College in the US, University of British Columbia in Canada, Durham University in England or University of Edinburgh in Scotland.  All of them beautiful places and I thank the Lord every day for His grace in allowing me all of this.  With this, however, challenged my principles yet again.  It made me think of the name of the university, the job prospects afterwards, people's reactions to my choice and the list continues.  I think, secretly, I knew what I wanted. My heart knew.  But I guess it was my fear that sent me into many long nights of thinking.  Perhaps to some the list seems so clear cut - "Just pick the most prestigious/famous university lah! Why so hard want to think?"  Yes, I understand that a more acclaimed university to the local community would help me get a job, it would look good in my CV, it would carry oohs and aahs as I tell people where I was going.

But

there was something about that whole idea that bugged me. All this while I have always believed in standing up for true education, in challenging what the majority says is "right", getting arts and science equally weighted, actually giving my heart back to society and stalwartly believing that a letter grade on a sheet of paper does not define who you are as a person.  Reflecting on all that I have been through made it even clearer to me that this is who I am and this is what I stood for.  And I felt there was a college that embodied this.

When I asked myself what I wanted for the next stage of my life, I found myself wanting to take the road less travelled by (again); to seek learning beyond the classroom over studying for exams, to do things out of love instead of obligation, to fully explore how far my love for art can take me and to surround myself with people who shared this belief.  It reminded me of the first post I did upon completion of high school and I believe my dream has not changed.  My perspectives may have shifted and my self coarsened but my vision remains: To be able to look back on my life and truly say that I have lived it to the fullest; I have made the most of what was laid before me because I had the courage to stand up for what I believed in. 

To be able to look back and proudly say, I did not regret a thing.

There are times I believe our dreams clash with the practicality of life being more than just "what makes you happy."  But I thank the Big Guy for making things somehow fall into place.  I can still reasonably say that my dreams and the reality of the world can still find some balance.  I was blessed enough to get a scholarship from the college itself which would be of immense help.  Still figuring out the entire financial issue but I have faith that my family can pull through this, somehow, some way.

*exhale* Wow, here I am scrolling up and wondering how in the world all of these words came out.  It definitely does not cover everything in my head but I think I'm happy with it.  I have yet another decision among many more to come that I am genuinely happy and extremely ecstatic about.  And I have said what I wanted to say, the entirety of which are my own thoughts.

I still do have a lot to tell about this coming college experience but I think I shall leave that for another day.  I shall leave you with the video that first intrigued, enticed and inspired me about this place:

Hampshire College. (:

I don't know what tomorrow holds nor do I know exactly what will happen from here.  But what I do know is that I am not alone.  The worries playing in my head are plenty but having faith that things will turn out according to His will is the best I can do.  It is enough for me. Till then.

Your curious traveller,

Andrea (: