Of Birthdays and Too Much Thinking

Cinema guy: What movie?

Me: The Thing.

Cinema guy: *clicks* Are you 18?

Me: Uh oh. *panics* Umm. *looks at friend and thinks* Wait...*epic realisation* Yea, I am 18.

Cinema guy: *gives are-you-sure look*

Me: *goes into ecstatic mode* Hahaha. YEAH, I'm EIGHTEEN!! Woots! *smiles as wide as I can*

Cinema guy: O......kay.

Haha. Last Friday, I went to watch this semi-horror movie called The Thing (which wasn't really horror actually) and apparently it was rated 18 probably because of the blood and goriness of it. And the conversation above was my first 'duh' moment when I realised that I actually have turned 18! I know it's very ordinary for youngsters to go for 18 movies (tsk.tsk), but I guess there's just this satisfying feeling inside me that is somewhat proud of myself. 18 sounds so...old and mature. Ah, well. It's not too bad. Turning 20 - now THAT would be unbelievable.

It was my first birthday in KL and it was GREAT! Parents flew over to celebrate so I don't think I could have had it any better! I've thought about the idea of celebrating birthdays with friends or college mates and I have nothing against it but for me, I feel happiest with family, really! And I guess when us teens get older, sometimes we start to stray away from family and hang out with friends more or what others might call 'having a social life'. Peer influence can be pretty strong these days but I think it's still up to the individual however he or she wants to live her life. Cheh. :)

Time flew by SO fast. Ice cream cake from Baskin and Robbins was sooo good and karaoke at Red Box was fun - made me realise how much songs have been out since I last really karaoke-ed. We also went on a food spree which was just the BEST but basically the accumulation of everything we did made my weekend :D. Thank you mommy and papa for a birthday filled with love and joy! I feel like the luckiest daughter on earth. It couldn't have been more perfect and I hope you had as much fun as I did :)

Discovered the awesome and famous Chinese food at Lot 10!

Forever grateful for all the well wishes from friends and family too! Receiving a call from my kakak back home wishing me happy birthday touched me beyond belief :') - it made my day and gave me that humbled feeling. She has the same birthday as me so SELAMAT HARI JADI KAKAK! I love you :*

Oh yes, another thing that was different this year was how long I've been away from my normal environment. Aside from the obvious differences, I realised a subtle contrast between being an only child and not I guess. I used to get quite mad at people who'd just jump to conclusions when you say you're an only child - they'll either have that hidden scrutiny in their eyes or just outwright say, "Oooooooohhhhh, no wonder la." And my mind'll start wondering: No wonder what? We just met. Does being an only child make THAT much of a difference until you act like you know EVERYTHING about me?

Haha. Woopsy, a slight rant there. But as the encounters increased, I learnt to give people a break - stereotypes and generalisations are inevitable and there is some truth behind it sometimes. I take a step back and I see society only focusing on the negative side of things. Yes, in a way, maybe we do get more attention and more attached to parents but if we learn to not throw tantrums and act mature just like any other child, I don't see anything too wrong in having a closer relationship with our folks. Yes, some of us can be spoilt brats but some of us can also NOT be. I know how too much pampering can be very bad and I don't deny the fact that it is indeed present in some families. But. Not. All.

I think living with siblings is a beautiful thing and people should be thankful for having brothers and sisters who will always be there for you coz it's in their blood! (: I think that being an only child is also a beautiful thing - instead of fearing the labels of mommy and daddy's child, EMBRACE it. Having been gone for pretty long, the stark clarity in my folks' endless love overwhelms and I think it is a blessing we shouldn't be ashamed of.

On a side note, say hello to my baby brother WYATT all the way in Montana!!! He decided to see the world on the 15th of October 2011 and is now being loved by a wonderful wonderful family. I got this picture along with a birthday email my grandparents sent me so I was just bursting with joy! Adowable!

I'm a proud sista! :D

Not forgetting a shout out to my sister Suzanah whose birthday was on the 12th! She is officially a teenager at 13 and as my host mom would say, they'll be A LOT of things happening in the house these coming years. Oh yes there will be. Stay your cheerful self Suzanah! Loves!

Having said all that, I guess the only thing left to say is : Hi, I have three people in my family and I am an only child. I have a host family of six people in Montana whom I love dearly just like true family. Haha. Yes, my parents do love me very dearly... Just like YOUR parents. Don't worry, I don't get too lonely, I think hanging out with my parents is pretty cool actually. After all, they did raise us since birth, don't you think? No, I wouldn't think I'd wish for a brother or a sister. I think it's an amazing thing but then again, maybe the Big Guy wanted this for a reason. Perhaps he wanted this to be my driving force to prove people wrong and work all the much harder to show society who I truly am even if everyone else has an upper hand.

You'll never know.

It just might be working *wink*

Selamat Hari Jadi Bev!

OCTOBER has arrived! And I can't believe this year is coming to an end.  Honestly, my mind has been nagging me to blog for the past few weeks but I never gave in until...today.  It's funny because I'd get these weird split-second moments when I'm minutes to falling asleep or randomly studying a poem about death during Literature class that this certain urge to write comes out of nowhere and then *snaps finger* it's gone. Hm.  Where do I start? Let's take it post by post.

First,

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY BEVERLY RACHEL MATUJAL!!!

I will forever find it ironic that your birthday falls a day before mine.  And to think we've been together since...Primary 1 but only got close AFTER 10 years? How is that even possible?!  You tell me. (: This is when the Big Guy steps in I guess. *wink*

*walks down memory lane* Well, even though you've told me that your perception of me during primary school may have been some distant figure (which I still don't get sometimes. Haha), I, on the other hand, actually remember you as the classmate in 3 Rose that was brave enough to state her ambition as wanting to be a songwriter, your grandpa waiting for you after school in his jeep, and your seemingly shy disposition which we all know now to be far from the truth. JOKES. :D

Bev: Funny kan my joke.
Me: Haha. Yea, very funny.

Sometimes, our relationship seems to be a funny one. I don't know how throughout those first few high school years, you came up with the nickname 'Loonie' for me which somehow miraculously stuck till today.  I remember despising it for the mere reason that...well, who in their right mind would want to be known as Loonie? BUT, as time progressed, I kind of took it as a compliment and due to the stars aligning (which happens once in a blue moon) and there was sign of the coming apocalypse, 

we became best friends. JOKES (about the stars aligning la). Haha.

What I mean to say is, Bev, I think you are the best person I know to exercise sarcasm with. Haha.  Knowing you has definitely loosened me up and made me go on non stop laughing sprees.  Perhaps you can tell by the way I write when I'm addressing it to you too! The way we crack each other up is very subtle and we use very... 'sharp' words if you know what I mean.  Trust me, this is special because if I were to do this with anyone else, they'd think I'm insane or just plain rude (Yes, I've tried it before. Bad experience). SO, thank you Bev for the wonderful wonderful conversations filled with sarcasm and mockery and all those aspects that don't constitute your conventional definition of friendship. :D I love you coz we are one and the same!!!

*sings*
It may seem cliche for me to wanna say
That you're not alone
You may call me uncool but it's a simple fact
I got your back!

Singing 'Send It On' during Convo!

Wish we could have sung more together! I'm not gonna go on and on about how musically talented you are, because I know you know :) I'm just going to say that you're ability to listen to a tune and instantly know it and you're raw gift on the piano AND guitar continue to astound me. But that's all you're getting :) You do an AMAZING job putting up with people around you who might not be as good as you too *ahem* me *ahem*

Choir moments were interesting - we got to know to know each other way more.  There have been pretty low moments throughout our friendship and saya susun sepuluh jari if I have caused you any pain OR affected other people close to you.  All I know is, that you are one positive and easy-going person so please stay the same Bev! I'll be there for you :)

Look how good we look pretending to study! :P

 Thanks for being there for me through it all ;)

Amber and I thank you from the bottom of our hearts. Kan Amber? :)

Hugs and Kisses all the way from KL!

This is For You, Amber

SO, college life has been picking up momentum and I can say that currently, my plate is pretty full. However, due to the urgency of the matter, I decided to call it a night after drama practice, reading about why Singapore left Malaysia, and doing Trigs for an hour BECAUSE there is something MORE important for me to announce. And that is...

*drumroll please*

HAPPY EIGHTEENTH BIRTHDAY 
AMBERLICIA ANTHONY THANE!

Let me put this simply - knowing you has been just AMAZING. I don't care if this sounds hard to believe but thank you for turning my life around when you stepped into it three years ago. Sometimes, it's funny how you can know a person for SO long and only truly get to know her after 8 years. The circumstances in which we met amuses me a lot. From just reading the newspapers together and a mere exchange of smiles in Form 3, to sitting together in Form 4, and to be HOLDING EACH OTHER'S HAND during the whole of Form 5 without expecting what life would throw at us. Honestly, Amber, even though you continue to disagree with me on this, I still think that you have handled everything that's happened with probably more grace than I could muster myself - I could never imagine myself in your situation. You constantly thank me for being by your side but I THINK you need to give more credit to yourself for being possibly the strongest person I know.

Three years ago, I was a teenage girl wondering why bad things happened to good people.  I told God that if he wanted to send me a guardian angel, He'd better be FAST. Coz I didn't have much time.

Who knew that in the whole scheme of things, he would send me two (:

I found it pretty surreal when we flew all the way to KL for the Clean and Clear gig. It wasn't about winning though. Looking back on all these moments spent together, I realised how hard it would be to go on such an adventure like that now. Thus, I feel so grateful with the unending laughter we had when visiting the fish spa and riding the roller coaster in Sunway Lagoon! Haha.

And then the end of our high school years - no one could believe graduation was here! I had a blast singing with you guys and I didn't think any other bunch of singing mates would have made me happier.

SO, as you can see. I have many things to say. But, in essence, this should sum it up. Amber, I wrote this not for public display or whatever reasons people blog for these days. I wrote this because I wish to celebrate the birthday of someone very special in my life.

If I were to thank you every day of my life, I would still not be able to compensate for what our friendship has done for me.

I write this with as much sincerity from the bottom of my heart

because you are worth it.

I love you. Know that I am here for you. Always.